Although our guest this week has worked with Steve-O, a normal vegan (I mean normal as in he’s vegan, but I guess outside of that he’s maybe not entirely normal per se—but I digress), she herself isn’t vegan. Weird!

She *is* just as funny though.

Please meet Cheri Hardman!

What is your name?

Cheri Hardman.

How long have you been a non-vegan?

For 61 delicious years.

Why have you decided not to be vegan? Describe your journey to veganism and where you got stalled.

When I was young, my mom fed me atrocious non-vegan food. I became indoctrinated and have not found my way back yet. Cults are hard to break out of, and my mom was particularly hypnotizing.

If you had to take one step toward becoming vegan, what would it be and why only one?

If I had to take one step, it would be to stop eating meat, and only one because all the other stuff is creamy and satisfies that infantile desire to sleep with a tummy full of milk.

Which fad diet or meat eating celebrity made you want to eat animals?

Back in the day, Weight Watchers made you eat liver once a week, and my mom was particularly good at preparing it.

What vegan food do you fear you’re missing out on as a non-vegan?

I don’t fear vegan food because I have never tried anything specifically because it’s vegan. I might be surprised.

Do you eat fish? You eat fish, right?

I do eat fish. Just had a tuna melt for lunch.

Do you share your home with any animals, human or not? Tell us about them.

I have three dogs, two of which are chihuahuas so they have obviously have issues. One of them is so codependent and anxiety ridden that my husband and I cannot have a conversation without him worrying that we are going to get a divorce.

The other chihuahua was rescued off the streets of Mexico, so she gets a pass for anything and everything.

The big dog is a Border Collie/Australian Shepherd so he is the most civilized of the group.

We also have two cats: a skinny one and a fat one.

I’ve always wondered if non-vegans do their own laundry. Do you? If so, describe your process and tell us what your biggest laundry mistake has been.

I used to do my own laundry, but I am the type that is enthusiastic about washing and drying but often leave piles of laundry unfolded. Therefore, my neurotic husband took over the task.

The biggest mistake about doing that is not that my husband took over the task but that when it was in piles my cats loved to sleep on it, leaving me zero chance of leaving the house furless.

What do you do for fun besides eating meat and dairy?

What else is there?

Do you have any upcoming projects you want to plug?

I have lots of shows coming up. I am most proud of “Roast Your Ex,” which is a show I produce every year right around Valentine’s Day. We will be doing it at Odd Otter Brewing Company in Tacoma on February 13th. You can always find details on cherihardman.com.

Make up a question of your own and answer it.

What is the hardest thing about aging?
The way younger people treat you. Jokes at your expense constantly get old, you know, like me.

Song: “She’s a Bad Mama Jama” by Carl Carlton
Recipe: Easy Vegan “Tuna” Melt